While support for parents of special-needs children can often be found through forums tied to a social service agency, advocacy group, or on the Internet, sometimes it comes out of the blue. For example, The Children's Clinic serves 80% of the most severely disabled low-income children in the Long Beach area. In an effort to bond with her patients, Dr. Nicholas tells patients about Tom and her family and she asks about their families. One of her patients has three children who are moderately or severely mentally handicapped.
“She always remembers to ask about my son,” Dr. Nicholas said. “She struggles financially and carries a huge burden and responsibility for her children.” Considering her circumstances, she added, “it's amazing she can actually think about somebody else. You see a grace and resilience among these people who accept and work with what they have.
“You're going to have different phases in working with your child with special needs, just like with any child,” Dr. Nicholas said. “Help them reach their greatest potential and accept them for who they are. I think all parents need to do that. But when you have a special-needs child you're forced to do that earlier. Be grateful for who your child is.”