Each member of the treating team should also introduce themselves. Even if the clinician has been working with the family, it is polite to be formal and give your name and role. Given the number of people the family sees every day, one should not assume that the family remembers all of the clinicians.
In teaching hospitals, providers should also help the family understand their level of training. Surrogates do not always understand the different roles or level of training between students, residents and fellows, advanced practice providers, consultants and their attending physicians. Uncertainty about the roles can lead to family members feeling as though they are receiving contradictory information. Family satisfaction decreases when multiple attending physicians are involved in a patient’s care [12]. When possible, a consistent presence among providers at family meetings is always best.
3. Ask the Family's Understanding of the Situation (Ask-Tell-Ask)
Most family meetings in the ICU will require the transmission of a large amount of medical information. Using a specific communication strategy, Ask-Tell-Ask ( Table 2 ), allows for the information to be calibrated based on what the family knows and wants to know.Asking the family to explain the situation in their own language reveals how well they understand the medical facts and helps the medical team determine what information will be most helpful to the family. An opening statement might be “We have all seen your dad and talked to many of his providers. It would help us all be on the same page if you can you tell me what the doctors are telling you?” Starting with the family’s understanding builds trust with the medical team as it creates an opportunity for the family to lead the meeting and indicates that the team is available to listen to their concerns. Asking surrogates for their understanding allows them to tell their story and not hear a reiteration of things they already know. Providing time for the family to share their perspective of the care elicits family’s concerns.
In a large meeting, ensure that all members of the family have an opportunity to communicate their concerns. Does a particular person do all of the talking? Are there individuals that do not speak at all? One way to further understand unspoken concerns during the meeting is to ask “I notice you have been quiet, what questions do you have that I can answer?” There may be several rounds of “asking” in order to ensure all the family members’ concerns are heard. Letting the family tell what they have heard helps the clinicians get a better idea of their health literacy. Do they explain information using technical data or jargon? Finally, as the family talks the clinicians can determine how surprising the “serious news” will be to them. For example, if the family says they know their dad is doing much worse and may die, the information to be delivered can be truncated. However if family incorrectly thinks their dad is doing better or is uncertain they will be much more surprised by the serious news.