"Try and be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then get some walking in, and try and live together in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations."
–Monty Python, "The Meaning of Life"
1. Set boundaries. This is arguably the most important aspect of the physician-patient relationship. A relationship like this is inherently fertile ground for such Freudian defenses as transference and projection. It’s important to recognize, too, that the process is not necessarily a one-way street. Freud was, after all, flawed like his subjects.
2. Don’t sweat the small stuff. This is self-evident, yet surprisingly difficult to remember.
3. Keep a journal. You’ll want to remember the good times, and keeping track of the bad times just shows you how far you’ve come.
4. Nourish your spirit – church, yoga, meditation. Take your pick. The best life advice I’ve ever received is that the mind needs structured space for quiet because otherwise you are never alone; there is always that voice in your head, constantly narrating your life and probably judging you for it.
5. There is a whole world outside of medicine. How easy is it to let our lives be consumed by our profession? How much happier would it make us to be reminded that music and literature and art exist? For my birthday this year, I asked my sister to give me a book that she thinks I should own.
6. Related to #5: Learn something outside of medicine. There are brilliant podcasts on science, the economy, politics. There are audio courses on great books or philosophy. Pick up a new instrument or a new language.
7. Indulge in the experiences that make you happy, whether that’s going to the beach, or eating out, throwing parties, or traveling. In the arguably dubious field of happiness research, studies show that spending money on experiences leads to happiness much more so than spending money on objects. (Of course, there may be a selection bias problem, in that it is entirely possible that people who are likely to buy experiences are happier at baseline than people who are likely to buy objects. But you get my meaning.)
8. Exercise. Run, take bike rides, walk your dog. Go for hikes. Take rowing lessons.
9. Sleep is crucial. We are not teenagers any longer, and it is a losing proposition to think that you can still get away with barely sleeping. If I get 8 hours of sleep, I am almost guaranteed to not be as grumpy at work. I feel refreshed, my mind is clearer, and I feel better equipped to deal with the challenges of the workday.
10. Forgive yourself – for the grumpiness, for mistakes, for bad outcomes that you could not possibly have done anything about.
11. Bonus: Mental health therapy, if done right, is a fantastic investment in yourself.
Dr. Chan practices rheumatology in Pawtucket, R.I.